Toxic Friendships

Have you ever had a friendship that leaves you feeling stressed, exhausted, crazy and confused? Then it just may be a toxic relationship.  Here are some indicators of a toxic friendship:

• Your friend puts you down.
• Your friend blames you for a variety of things, including not being a good friend.  
• They may embellish or make up stories.
• They use guilt as a means to continue the friendship. 
• They accuse you of not caring.
• You feel exhausted after talking to your friend on a regular basis
• The relationship isn't balanced.  Your friend always is bringing problems to you.
• Your friend is always needy of you.
• Your friend is critical of you.
• Your friend tries to pit others against you or you against others.
• You feel a little crazy (or maybe a lot crazy) after being with or talking to them.
• Its all give on your part and take on theirs.
• There is always some sort of controversy or drama in their life (often times self-inflicted).

In essence, they suck the life out of you.  The expression "frienemies" comes to mind when dealing with these people.  You think they are your friend, but they sure don't act like one.  And the big question is, should you stay in this friendship?

To answer this question, you might ask yourself these questions: Is this relationship healthy? Is it positive?  Is it building me up or tearing me down?  If you decide that it isn't healthy, positive or uplifting, it might be time to think about ending the relationship.

Ending the relationship, will naturally be difficult.  Your friend will fight it.  She may blame you for not being a good friend.  She may lash out in anger.  She may talk bad about you.  She may try to turn other friends against you.  This can all be difficult, but you must decide to let go of the craziness and move on, lest you will be stressed and torn up.

Here is a quote to help you through the break up:

"People enter and exit your life, and sometimes exits are for the best. Do not think of ending friendship as a failure."  Anonymous

And one of my favorite poems:

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support,
To aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are..
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
This person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.

Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons,
Things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.

Your job is to accept the lesson,
Love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant

Thank you for being a part of my life,
Whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

UNKNOWN

#Giveaway: $300 American Girl Doll Gift Card

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Co-Host:

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Come and join us on this great giveaway.

We are giving away an American Girl Doll Gift Card of $300

This giveaway will run from:

May 1 to May 31

US only

Winner will have 48hrs to request prize or a new winner will be chosen.

Note: Starting the next giveaway, Twitter links will no longer be on the RC.  They will have independent pages, this will make it easier to enter.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Disclosure: Ann I Am is not responsible for prize. If you have any questions about this giveaway please send an email to nysavingspecials@gmail.com.  All entries are optional, if you do any of the tasks with the 10 extra entries, even if you do one entry you can get the extra 10 entries  but if the winner tasks is a tasks you did not complete, a second winner will be chosen. If the winner tasks is the one you did you will be the winner.

NYSavingSpecials is responsible for prize.

MUST READ! Abercrombie & Fitch Brand Adjustment #fitchthehomeless

I was really disgusted to read statements Abercrombie and Fitch's CEO reportedly made concerning his shoppers.  Apparently, he reportedly said this in an interview:  “In every school there are the cool and popular kids, and then there are the not-so-cool kids. Candidly, we go after the cool kids. We go after the attractive all-American kid with a great attitude and a lot of friends. A lot of people don’t belong [in our clothes], and they can’t belong. Are we exclusionary? Absolutely."  The store doesn't carry  women's clothing in sizes XL because they don't want heavy people wearing their brand (citation).  Pretty sad.  Very high schoolish if you ask me.  As I have always said, people graduate high school and some never leave it.

I like this guy's idea of how to change A&F's image.  I think he has it right.  Watch this video and you will see!  Make sure you share this with your friends!

#FREE Music Download! Dawes / Shovels and Rope SUMMER TOUR SAMPLER #mp3

Water Woes and Tips for Saving Water #eco

You ever have one of those days?  I had a jam packed weekend and was trying to figure out how I was going to accomplish it all and still drive 2 hours to a Mother's Day, graduation and birthday party on Sunday.  I was doing okay and making decent progress on my tasks on Saturday.  That was, till we had a plumbing problem.  Not that major, but one where the water in the entire house had to be shut off.

Of course, my hair desperately needed washed but I figured since I was just going to be working around the house, that I would wait another day.  I knew cooking would be difficult without water.  And then I started thinking about toilets. Can't flush those without water.  Four people and two days without water?  That could make for a stinky house.

Fortunately, the campground about 20 minutes down the road had some cancellations due to Friday's rains and we were able to get in there.  They, of course, had water!  So, within an hour, we had the camper hooked up, had overnight bags, and what little food was left in the house.  (Of course, I had planned to go to the grocery late Saturday evening, so we were sparse on the basics.)

We take water for granted, until we don't have any.  Of all the earth's water, only a very small amount is usable for humans.  We need to take care and conserve when we can.

We all know the basics--shorter showers, don't run water while brushing teeth, etc. I have a couple more suggestions for the family.

• We use refillable water bottles when we go places.  Sometimes, when we get home, there is still water in them but they need to be washed.  I collect that water and use it in the dog bowl (seriously, Fido does NOT care) or water house plants (they don't care either) with it.
• Don't use as much ice in your beverages.
• Finished with your ice cold beverage and find you still have ice?  Toss the cubes on house plants or in the planters outside.  Once again, trust me, the plants don't care!  
• If you can, reuse water when doing laundry.  My mom had wash tubs right next to her washing machine.  She would allow the second rinse water (which is pretty clean) to fill up in her laundry tub.  Then she would use that water to fill up the washing machine for the next load of laundry.  (Unfortunately, I don't have room for this type of setup.)
• Run your washing machine and dishwasher only when there are full loads.  
• Stop!  Don't toss what you wore in the dirty laundry without checking it first.  If there are no odors or stains, it can be worn again before washing.  (Your clothing will also last longer.)
• When watering outdoors, morning (or evening) is the best time to get the most out of the water you use.  Watering in the afternoons is wasteful as much of the water is evaporated.
• Wash your car at a car wash that recycles the water.

Remember, not only do you conserve water, you will save money on your water bill!

**I usually keep a pitcher by my sink to catch leftover ice and water.  I then use it to fill my water cans.

For Mother's Everywhere...and Those Who Just Want a Smile

This video is sure to make you smile--LOVE this kid!  Happy Mother's Day!